Actually, I think all addiction starts with soda. Every junkie did soda first. But no one counts that. Maybe they should. The soda connection is clear. Why isn't a presidential commission looking into this? Or at least some guys from the National Carbonation Council.
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Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special.
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Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to.
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Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.
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I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.
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There are people who would like tog et rid of minimum wage. But we have to have it, because if we didn't some people would not get paid money. They would work all week for two loaves of bread and some Spam.
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You don't pay taxes - they take taxes.
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If a kid call his grandma 'Momma' and his momma 'Pam', he going to jail!
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