Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list.
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In America you can always find a party. In Russia the party always finds you.
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In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete.
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In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
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Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there.
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