So for a while now, I have had a lot of problems, and after googling my symptoms I am 99% I have depression and anxiety.
*I am only looking for people who actually have/had anxiety and or depression to help me. I read a lot of these things and I can tell when people dont really understand it. If your only advice is for me to see a doctor or a therapist, or eat right and exercise, please do not waste your time answering me.. And I am not looking to spend money on a book, or spend $100 a month on some *miracle cure*
*I am not looking for people to tell me to go to a doctor or therapist or get on medication.
I am 21 Female, and my mother has anxiety, and I never had it until about a year and a half ago. I used to take melatonin pills at night to help me sleep, and when I went to visit my mom I forgot them, and she had some prescription sleeping pills and I really had to go to bed early that night so I took one, (I know its not smart but people used to always give me their prescription ibuprophen and stuff so I didnt really think much of it) anyways, I got really really tired in like 10 minutes, but it didn't feel like I was tired, I felt like if I went to bed I was going to die, it was the scariest moment I ever had.. Finally I told my sister, and luckily she told me to throw it up, and after that I felt a lot better. To this day I cannot take sleeping pills without having an anxiety attack. I didnt know it was a panic attack until a few months later when I started getting them a lot. I had at least one a day, and then after a couple months I had them once a week, and now I dont get the actual panic attacks all that frequently, but I do have really bad anxiety. I don't have my drivers licence because everytime I get behind the wheel I completely freak out every time I see another car. And I think about dying like a lot lot. I have a really bad fear of dying, that I never had a year and a half a go. Every time im in a car and we are getting onto a freeway, my heart races because Im way too scared to die. And my social life sucks. I used to love people, and I still do, I just dont care too much to be around them anymore. I have a girlfriend, and it doesnt really interfere with our relationship, except for the fact that all she knows is I have anxiety. But every time Im around people now all I think about is how bad I want them to just go away. Now the depression part.. Im just not as happy as I used to be. I dont really know how to describe it, but like, in my head, I really love school and am super excited to do my homework and pick hard classes because I love the challenge.. but once school begins, I just dont care anymore. I go to do my homework and I just half ass it. Its not just school, I set my mind to do something and once I go to really do it i just lose ALL interest. And i often just feel down and sad. I have had super low energy for a while now. I have been a vegan for about 5 years, and once I found out about this anxiety and depression, I went on a completely raw food diet, and Its not that I noticed myself feel better, but when ever I stopped I felt worse. So I went back on it, but then one day I just didnt care anymore, and I know I dont eat healthy anymore, and I dont really eat as often, I think I eat a lot, but then when I reflect on my day, its mostly just snacking. I have tried yoga and I love it, but My energy is so low that I just dont want to. My sleep is off, I sleep anywhere between 5-10 hours a day, and either way Im tired all day. I know my eating and lack of exercise ARE a problem, but its not THE problem, they were effects of what im going through. I used to be a huge health nut and watch everything I ate, but now I just have no desire to care anymore.
A couple things, my entire life, every there was something wrong with me, people just said I was making it up and just wanted attention, this is why its kinda hard for me to really tell anyone, and why I dont want to go to a doctor.. I dont want to be told Im just making it up. And people that I do tell that I have anxiety, they all just say i am overreacting... so I am not too open to doctors and therapists.
**I am not looking for someone to tell me to just diet and exercise.. I am looking for things I can do to help me WANT to eat right and exercise. Like over the counter medication, (non prescription) or anything like that.
I know I didnt really put everything I wanted to in here, but after hundreds of google searches I am certain I have anxiety and depression.

>>>I dont know how relevant it is, but Im prone to cold sores, I typically get one every 3-6 months. Its usually jsut me and my girlfriend, but this last summer we stayed with her family for 3 months, and I got like 6 of them in the course of the 3 months. They were always really nice, I just really hated being around them all the time, and I used to be absolutely LOVE being around people all the time. I used to hate being alone, but now I always feel a need to be alone. I know its normal to have a desire to have some alone time, but its not normal for me.. In high school I had a ton of friends, but I dont have a single friend. I care, but then again I really dont care..

I have tried something called 5HTP and it worked for a little bit but not anymore.
Please only tell me things that YOU know that work, not just some artice that you read.
I dont want something that will take months to start working, I am looking for something that will help me ASAP because I am so tired of feeling like this.