OK, im a 19yr man and I've been going though a lot recently. i feel, Ultra Depressed. i mean at the start of 2014 I've just been having bad luck after bad luck every day. first my grandfather passed away and i havent even teared up or reacted any way to it, then when it was my birthday nobody celebrated it because it was like two weeks after the cremation. i let my best friend stay with me, only for him to become best friends with my mom and we dont even speak any more. my mom chooses him over me now. i dont have the trust nor do i trust anybody. my cousin who i once hated is now trying to become friends with me. i've lost all faith in people, i've contemplated suicide many times, but i dont really want to kill myself. so the best solution i know is to destroy all connections with my family and just runaway to someplace else and start a new life.
you know i think i would kick the new friend best friend to the curb and the one thats trying to become your friend let him go to we know what that really feels like to loose someone to dealth not a good feeling i would support going to another state to start of sometimes thats the best result for starting over sometimes those moves are the best were you close to your grandpa also i would seek out a mental health therapist he can help you sort this all out