I’m friends with someone who is clinically depressed. I’m told it’s a toxic relationship, considering I dread being around him and he manipulates me. He will threaten me to do stuff with cutting himself. He is not faking his depression, but he gets what he wants using it. He also uses my own weakness against me. (I don’t want to go into a lot of detail but it might help if I gave an example: I myself cut, he says if I don’t stop in a week he’s going to cut as well, but he goes to cut anyways. This happened quite recently) All my other friends have cut ties with him, this has made his mental state worse and I’ve had to talk him out of suicide twice. My friends say I need to leave him, they have noticed my own mental health has gotten significantly worse since I met him, but I know if I leave he will likely commit suicide. Who wants to be the reason someone commits suicide?
I’m in a toxic relationship with one of my really depressed friends but I’m scared to leave?
- Posted:
- 3+ months ago by Ijustneed...
- Topics:
- friend, leave, scared, toxic, depressed, dreads, relationship, friends, relationships
Added 3+ months ago:
Thank you guys so much for the answers, I’m still a bit conflicted but this definitely helped. I’m seeing a therapist and I’m trying to get my friend to see one too, he just won’t listen to me sadly.
Answers (5)
dont leave him. he obviously needs help and he needs a friend to stick by him. you will feel very guilty if he does decide to commit suicide and you're not there for him when he actually needs it. and if you are struggling with your mental health, you should go to a nearby counselor to get some advice.
You call it a toxic relationship but it's clear you don't have a clue what that means.
Being around him is dangerous to your mental health and your physical well being.
He is emotionally blackmailing you and you allow it.
If he threatens suicide you tell him go right ahead but he is not going to blackmail you any further and as soon as you hang up you will be calling 911 and reporting him and he can explain it to the police.
Record anything you can or get him to text you his threats. Send it all to his parents and give it to the police.
Get him blocked on ALL social media and change your phone number. You should be in therapy and he should be an inpatient on a psych unit.
The two of you are playing very sick games with each other and if you want to get healthy this should cover several sessions of therapy with your own therapist.
This is definitely a tricky situation. I don't know how possible it is, but is there a way he could be willing to be admitted to a behavioral health institution to help resolve his depression and leave him under medical supervision? That way you don't have to feel responsible for everything he does and in that kind of hospital unit, the staff there can help him recover. Him blackmailing you into doing things to get what he wants is certainly not healthy for either of you. Depression is very rough and I commend you for staying with him, but you can't let your mental health deteriorate because of monitoring him. Your health is just as important as his. I feel like if you left him like the other friends did he could potentially harm himself like he claims, or is just amplifying it to get what he wants. But it's not worth the risk.