could really use some advice. My boyfriend and I were together nearly 10 yrs. We were together from age 18 to 28. Just before he broke up with me my brother had died a few months beforehand. After we broke up he knew I still wanted to be with him and we carried on sleeping together. However, I felt he had met someone else. He said he hadnt the two times I asked. One day at my house I saw a small lovebite on his neck (he denied it) so I looked in his fone when he went to the toilet and saw a message from his boss talking about how she knows she needs to sort herself out and how he is her soulmate.

I did not say anything. A few weeks later he came with me and my family to the grave as it was the yr anniversary of his death. Afterwards I confronted him and he only aknowledged anything after I said I had read the message. He said he thinks he can love her and that she is the opposite to me. He wants to be friends and cannot say whether we will get bk together but loves me very much. He started telling me about her life (mother who was a drug addict, etc) He then got me a tablet for christmas. Between christmas and new year we then had a major row where I was crying and was just so upset. He got mad and was shouting at me saying i’m pushing him away and I knew the deal when we slept together (which I really didnt!)

I then had NC for just over 3 weeks and my phone contract had ended so he had no means of contacting me. I then emailed him:

Hey,

Just wanted to see how your doing.. howz the job,etc

Hope all is well

He replied:

Hi,

i’m good thanks, hope you’re ok, was thinking about your driving test couldn’t remember the date? wanted to send out a good luck if you haven’t done it yet, and if you have i really hope you passed!!

Have you sorted your mobile yet? feels a bit weird doing email.

Anyway, really hope both you and dana are ok (my mum), send me your no if you do have a phone sorted.

I then replied just keeping it light, not mentioning anythink to do with us. The only reference I made was that I think it best to communicate through email as Its better for me at the min. He hasnt replied.

From here i dont know what to do. I believe he started to see her before the end of our relationship (as apparently she said to him ‘did you break up with her bcause of me) and then strung both of us along for a yr before choosing her. However he still wants to be friends.

I dont know whether hes helping his guilt, he still has feelings, etc??? but I know how long we were together and how close we were for so long I dont understand how he can already be in a committed relationship talking about love.

Any advice would be appreciated.