I have been suffering with depression for approximately 10 years now, I have been in a serious relationship with my fiancé for nearly 4 years now and he know about my depression but for the last 6 months he keeps saying to me he down and depressed or he is having a bad day and feels like shit, I know I need to be supportive but when your saying stuff like that to someone who suffers from depression then it's hard to be supportive but he doesn't seem to understand when he is saying it that it is hurt me, he says things like you don't understand the way I'm feeling! I've told him if he feels that bad then he needs to go and see a doctor and he turns around and says there's nothing wrong with me I'm just feeling down. I don't know where to turn and he doesn't realise when he says he's down and depressed just cause he's having a bad day how much it hurts me and upset it makes me. Can anyone relate to this and help me?
Help with depression?
- Posted:
- 3+ months ago by djsinger
- Topics:
- year, depression, relationship, suffering, years, relationships
Answers (3)
I think you should give him some space for a while and let him think it out. Just let him know that you are there for him and ready to talk. Also, it may be that how you feel upset when he is depressed may feel the same way when you are depressed. I have been through depression, and I know it is no fun. But you have to push yourself out of there. Be happy for the things you have. Think about all of the good times you will spend with your soon to be husband. Plan your wedding. See, there is a lot you can be happy about rather than be depressed. Don't think about people who are above you, but below you. Think of all those people who would love to be in your place. Cheer up; you have everything that you need to live. Just be happy.
Late response but get to understand him, why is he feeling down? what's happening? Leaving someone alone causes their depression to increase, making them think that they aren't wanted, making them feel lonely and unwanted. This leads to denial and it causes them to think that there will be no one in the world that will ever try to understand them or talk to them. You need to get past those fake smiles, past those "I'm fine," statements and talk to him. Get to truly understand him and he'll eventually let you into the small bubble he created from the world. Sure you won't understand the pain he's going through but if you're willing to talk to him even if he says "I don't want to talk right now" then you will have a positive outcome in the end. Just be careful with the steps you take, life is meant to be taken slowly. You don't run in headfirst hoping for something good, take your time and eventually, the rain will stop and the sun will come out once more.