So, I recently started college and I was a part of a small circle of good friends. We had a falling out but tried to fix the friendship we all had. But, that process dragged on and eventually only me and one of my friends hung out anymore.
People have seemed to notice how it's always just me and this person and think we're in our own world. A couple of my classmates recently approached when when my friend was absent and said they're worried I'm alone all the time. At first I thought it was sweet and saw it as an opportunity to make friends but then I realized a lot of people in my class (most of them, I believe) noticed this and may have talked a little about it.
I appreciate their sympathy but at the same time it's incredibly embarrassing. I don't particularly mind being alone when my friend isn't here but now that I know they see me like that, and notice me, I feel so uncomfortable. They told me it's up to me now, they made a move and now it's my turn. I told them I find it hard to talk to and randomly approach people and they were nice about it. But, how in the world do I just start now especially when I know they're watching me. I feel incredibly self-conscious, anxious and worried. My anxiety spiked as soon as they left and I was so embarrassed.
What do I do? I'm also a very weary person as I had recently been through a somewhat traumatizing friendship in high school. Where all my friends left me. So, am I just shy or antisocial? I do want to make friends but constantly question myself and those around me.