In 1971, my mother became pregnant with me when she was 19. My biological father and my mother broke up and he was never in the picture. Two years later my mother remarried and I was raised by her husband. I am now 38 years old and have been having some health problems which have caused me to become curious of my paternal medical history. My mother could not find my birth father's phone number, but found his mother who is still alive, and contacted her using a fake excuse. During that conversation my "grandmother" (who doesn't even know I exist) revealed that my father had married and had a daughter (my half-sister) who is now 35 years old. Knowing my father's name, his daughter's name, and his wife's name, and the city they live in, I was able to locate my sister's facebook profile within minutes. My father has not called my mother back yet, and I'm not sure he will. I am saddened to find out that I have a sister that I was kept away from for 35 years and of course I want to contact her, but for all I know she has no idea that exist. I don't know what to do, but it makes me sad to see her picture on facebook and imagine that I might never meet her. Any suggestions?
Responses (5)
I feel for you. I'm sorry you had to find out that u had a sis u've never met. That must be hard for you. Um, the only thing I can suggest is to wait and see if your father calls your mother. If he doesnt ask your mother what you should do . I mean i am really big on family and me, being an emotional female at 26 years old, I would contact my long lost sibling myself. Life is too short my friend. I really hope that things work out and I hope that everyone can get along so that you can some day meet your sister. It's a shame though, some people hurt in this life for all the wrong reasons.
i am in a similar situation - mine being my parents adopted a child out early 60s, then got married and had four more kids. i found out about the adopted child about a decade ago. then five years ago photos and info 'fell' into my lap. its been a struggle but out of respect for my parents who are still alive, i will not be contacting this person. I had to ask myself all sorts of questions like - what is going to be achieved? is it out of curiousity? and then once contact has been made where to from there? I need to respect my parents decision made at the time as times were different. you need to ask yourself similar questions - and not listen to well intended people. you also need to think of the other people involved and what your actions may mean or do to them. Good luck.